# Getting things past the "Wife"



## rpc7271 (Jan 2, 2008)

I've been a mamber of this forum for about 5 years now. Over the years I have heard a number of people mention needing to get things past the wife. Mostly items that cost a pretty penny. One suggestion, mention that the family car is getting on in years and that it will need to be replaced soon. As you drive around start noticing Corvettes. Mention a couple of times that you have always wanted to have one and that your getting on in years. Get a subscription to Corvette magazine. When she complains go out and start test driving them. TAKE HER WITH YOU. Give her the ride of her life. Do the math. Show her how when you buy one for $65,000 and sell it in 3 years for $50,00 that's only $15,000, less than a new Camery! If all else fails tell her you will give up the trains for the Corvette! Join the local Corvette club. Eventually she will figure out that the trains are infinately better that the Corvette.


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## Greg Elmassian (Jan 3, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Hmm... tried that... but what if you want the Corvette AND trains? 

Solution, buy her an expensive car... worked (until bought another sports car!) 

ha ha! 

Regards, Greg


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## Jeff Livingston (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Thankfully I've never had to deal with this issue. We have and agreement, I don't count the shoes in her closet, she doesn't count the trains in the garage. 

Jeff Livingston 
Kaneohe, Hawaii


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## GG (Jan 1, 2009)

LOL

A 3K Pfaff Sewing machine shut my wife up....

gg


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## Greg Elmassian (Jan 3, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Good idea! Never thought of that.... she has a whole wall of shoes in the closet... of course last time she got mad, she counted all my cigars and multiplied by $25.... that hurt... 

Hide the cigars and count shoes, I'm on a mission! 

Thanks, Greg


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## Spule 4 (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Just be honest, my wife pays all the bills, nothing hidden, no arguments ever.


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## KYYADA (Mar 24, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

You should never use something they may want. I just bought a welder and told the wife I was looking at another welder on ebay. She said you just bought one, Oh that one is different this one is a mig. Dazed and confused she said I didn't need another welder ...I casually mentioned I might just get an auto darkening helment ( what I wanted all along ). She seemed pleased and never questioned it. 

I sure am glad she never visits this forum... 

Johnny


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## Trains (Jan 2, 2008)

The wife buys what she wants, I buy what I want, we get along great.


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## aceinspp (Jan 2, 2008)

I'd have to agree with she buys what she want's and i do the same. I bought a Z06 vette new in 03 and she even encourage me to buy it as she knew I always wanted one. Trains I just buy no questions asked same if she goes out and buys things. Got to love it. Even bought her a new truck to drive to work. She loves it. Later RJD


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## Nicholas Savatgy (Dec 17, 2008)

Posted By aceinspp on 05/28/2009 5:30 PM
I'd have to agree with she buys what she want's and i do the same. I bought a Z06 vette new in 03 and she even encourage me to buy it as she knew I always wanted one. Trains I just buy no questions asked same if she goes out and buys things. Got to love it. Even bought her a new truck to drive to work. She loves it. Later RJD



*Must be nice? i to wish some day to buy the things i want. for now i have to settle for a couple of trains and a ratty broken down pickup............ Dam you power players







*


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## Biblegrove RR (Jan 4, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Amen! I hear about it every time I get anything! Even if it's "my" money! I don't lie so if stuff just shows up someday, is that dishonest?


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## Randy Stone (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

I've been married for 11 years now. I had the real Corvette when we got married, a room full of toy cars and American Flyer Trains. A bonified collect a holic. The wife collects Tweety Birds and Marry Moos. Problem is, I'm the one that bought 99% of them for her. While she likes them she doesn't go looking to buy them. Thus the problem. I buy big ticket items and once in a while I by her something. When we were both working, she had no problem with me purchasing trains. But with both of us out of work, she thinks we should become frugal and save save save. Most people would agree with the wife and say I should be saving every penny. But Ebay keeps calling. So many great deals. I've passed on thousands of dollars of stuff I wanted. But now and again, something reaches out and grabs me. Now what if I find that elusive RS-3 below? I've been looking for months and not found a single one for sale at any price. How will I resist if one comes along at a reasonable price? 

Randy


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## NTCGRR (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

We will be married 25 years now and after me buying the Big Boy, Carrie figures its all down hill now. I'm running out of gas (energy) and space. And time.


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## work4fil (Jan 4, 2008)

I have known my "Reason For Life" 32 years and we have been married for 29 of those "happy years" ( I figure 28 for her and one for me). The older I get (and continually she tells me she is letting me get older instead of arranging a series of unfortunate events to take place), I have learned that age and treachery make up for youth and enthusiasm. Though she says she supports my trains (I guess I should be shopping for F-units because she refers to them that way), I find it so much easier to ask for her fogiveness on purchases rather than permission to spend money I am supposed to be giving her every pay day.


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## Gary Armitstead (Jan 2, 2008)

We've known each other for over forty-four years. Been married 39 years this June. Separate MC cards and accounts. Never been a problem at all.


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## GG (Jan 1, 2009)

Posted By gary Armitstead on 05/28/2009 9:29 PM
We've known each other for over forty-four years. Been married 39 years this June. Separate MC cards and accounts. Never been a problem at all.










Bingo ! 

26 years here and yes separate as to property.... 


NO problem.... 

However.... when she comes to me to pay for over spending on her perfumes etc... ( I do indeed get my trains... ) 


gg


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## Richard Smith (Jan 2, 2008)

Posted By rpc7271 on 05/28/2009 3:02 PM
I've been a mamber of this forum for about 5 years now. Over the years I have heard a number of people mention needing to get things past the wife. Mostly items that cost a pretty penny. One suggestion, mention that the family car is getting on in years and that it will need to be replaced soon. As you drive around start noticing Corvettes. Mention a couple of times that you have always wanted to have one and that your getting on in years. Get a subscription to Corvette magazine. When she complains go out and start test driving them. TAKE HER WITH YOU. Give her the ride of her life. Do the math. Show her how when you buy one for $65,000 and sell it in 3 years for $50,00 that's only $15,000, less than a new Camery! If all else fails tell her you will give up the trains for the Corvette! Join the local Corvette club. Eventually she will figure out that the trains are infinately better that the Corvette. 

Be very careful here! Especially when taking her along on a test drive. When I bought my first Lincoln in 1980 I told my wife that I'd always wanted one. Too big she said (she was driving a Capri). She felt much more comfortable in a small car and could never drive that big thing.

Well to make a long story short she finally relented and drove that "big ol' thing". Then I couldn't get her out of it, She wound up driving it to work thereafter and I drove my old GMC pickup. hehehe! At least she was safer in the Lincoln and since she was much more precious than any car I guess it was worth it. Of course I was relegated to driving "her" Lincoln only when we went somewhere together on weekends, etc. 

Think what will happen if your sweet significant other test drives the Corvette and says go ahead...buy it! There goes not only the Corvette but the trains as well because you'll be broke buying the car.


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## afinegan (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

I bought my wife a new dinning room set (table and china), then she let me build this  










I am still restricted to 1 live steam engine a year though (will get around this as the raises at work come in hopefully).


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## SE18 (Feb 21, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

my trick is to build all my trains, which I enjoy doing anyway. Trouble is, all those tools for building them cost big bucks. 

I got around this, by purchasing tools to do home improvement projects. I'm happy, wife's happy, and the home and layout improves. 

Incidentally, I keep a list of home improvement projects to do and let her prioritize them; once every 3 months I do a project. I'm working on cleaning the garage and building an access ladder to the attic so that I can move stuff from garage up there (stuff that is immune from heat and humidity). This gives her space to park the car and more space for me to do train projects. 

If this sounds like something you'd like to do, visit http://www.7-8ths.info/index.php?action=forum the 7/8 forum to see homemade projects (99%) for outdoor trains; then save your $ for tools.


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## weaverc (Jan 2, 2008)

It is my opinion that you should set by agreement an upper limit, under which you can buy stuff without permission. Over that, have a discussion and resolve the issue before hand. 


I was once told that it is easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission. I tried it a couple of times in my last life and can tell you from experience that it's NOT TRUE. Bite the bullet and be honest about your purchases. It lasts longer.


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## neals645 (Apr 7, 2008)

Posted By Greg Elmassian on 05/28/2009 3:10 PM
Hmm... tried that... but what if you want the Corvette AND trains? 

Solution, buy her an expensive car... worked (until bought another sports car!) 

ha ha! 

Regards, Greg


Do not buy her a car until the trains are on the track! My wife got a nice car but still no trains for me and now we're in the poor house!

Neal


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## jlinde (Jan 2, 2008)

My wife and I decided to separate checking accounts a few months ago after years of quibbling over my purchases. The disagreements related less to the impact on our financial bottom line and more on a value judgment related to my priorities - i.e., she spent her money on "useful" and "practical" things and I cluttered up the house with "toys." While she did bless my 911 purchase last year, she spit the bit this morning when she discovered that a 1/10th scale electric unlimited hydro had magically appeared in the dining room.


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## ShadsTrains (Dec 27, 2007)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

I just put Melony on notice that I will not be coming home from the BTS empty handed.


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## Mik (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Funny, every time I used to find something I liked my (now ex) wife hit the roof. 

Meanwhile, the new GF has laid claim to 3 of the last 5 locomotives that I built.... and two future projects as well.


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## Spule 4 (Jan 2, 2008)

Posted By jlinde on 05/29/2009 4:07 PM
My wife and I decided to separate checking accounts a few months ago after years of quibbling over my purchases. The disagreements related less to the impact on our financial bottom line and more on a value judgment related to my priorities - i.e., she spent her money on "useful" and "practical" things and I cluttered up the house with "toys." While she did bless my 911 purchase last year, she spit the bit this morning when she discovered that a 1/10th scale electric unlimited hydro had magically appeared in the dining room. 














In my house it is all location, location, location. Rally group 2 Volvo B20 head build, expensive and OK.

Just not cool when its owner (me) feels it should be considered a work of art on the coffee table Vs. in the garage, or......when is that car going to run again?


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## Semper Vaporo (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

My wife always bought what she wanted with my money and I always bought what she wanted with my money. That's fair, ain't it?


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## ohioriverrailway (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Yep, it works here. Melody and I each have our own accounts and income to use as we please. She has her hobbies/interests and I have mine. Peaceful co-existance!!


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## Semper Vaporo (Jan 2, 2008)

Posted By ohioriverrailway on 05/31/2009 8:02 AM
Yep, it works here. Melody and I each have our own accounts and income to use as we please. She has her hobbies/interests and I have mine. Peaceful co-existance!!


Rick, if you are responding, "Yep" to what I wrote, you need to go back and reread what I wrote.


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## dltrains (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Semper, 
I think you described the majority of us no matter how the money is split. 

Dave


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## Engineercub (Oct 18, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Hmmmm, this is quite a predicament for some of you. I am a live and let live person. It is kind of my philosophy that if someone loves you then within the boundaries of reason, they should want and cater to your happiness as you do theirs. Inequality sure does not work. All it does is fuel resentment. I'm all for my partner buying things for themselves and expect the same in return. I'm certainly noone to take marital advise from, but heck guys... buy your trains so long as it doesn't get you into financial trouble. Be equal with the money and let her buy things of the same value. Trust me, she is just as boggled why you need another locomotive when you already have 56 of them as you are about why she needs more shoes when she already has 56 of them. Alpha/Omega, Good/Evil, Yin/Yang, Day/Night, Rain/Shine, HappyHusband/HappyWife, MiserableHusband/MiserableWife, balance my friends, balance... 

-Will


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## Spule 4 (Jan 2, 2008)

Posted By Engineercub on 05/31/2009 5:20 PM
Hmmmm, this is quite a predicament for some of you. I am a live and let live person. It is kind of my philosophy that if someone loves you then within the boundaries of reason, they should want and cater to your happiness as you do theirs. Inequality sure does not work. All it does is fuel resentment. I'm all for my partner buying things for themselves and expect the same in return. I'm certainly noone to take marital advise from, but heck guys... buy your trains so long as it doesn't get you into financial trouble. Be equal with the money and let her buy things of the same value. Trust me, she is just as boggled why you need another locomotive when you already have 56 of them as you are about why she needs more shoes when she already has 56 of them. Alpha/Omega, Good/Evil, Yin/Yang, Day/Night, Rain/Shine, HappyHusband/HappyWife, MiserableHusband/MiserableWife, balance my friends, balance... 

-Will


I think you summed it up best, what I tried to elude to in my post.


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## sang_route (Sep 24, 2008)

I am still in the inguagment process but she has desided that trains are my safest hobby (compaired to high exploseves, rifles, trucks and anything built by International Harvester) and as long as we can walk threw the house is ok. I seems to help me "keep my sanity" to which i say when did i ever have it?


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## wchasr (Jan 2, 2008)

Aha! A subject I've some experience in....

The starter wife (she demanded NOt to be called an X...something came to mind about asking ehr to choose another letter of the alphabet then....mutter mutter ...

We never had any money and I worked extra jobs to be able to afford my toys and cover all our expenses as well. She never really got my "toys" but tolerated them usually. When things finally dissolved the trains were valued at more than the house we lived in. I got to keep the trains, she got to keep the house and we split the bills. After it was all said and done she still tells me from time to time she misses my trains. 

The new wife. The love of my life, has her check book and I have mine. We split the bills up and i take care of what I can and she does her part. We ask for help if need be and discuss major purchases which usually are on my side of the equation more than hers. Waht I've foudn is that there is ALWAYS something to spend money on now that we have kids. Rarely does train money come out of my regular income and my extra income is slim to none with kids active in afterschool activities and all my extra curricular activites. Oh well we are ALL having fun.

You guys gotta communicate with them. My wife (old and new) both would have gone for the Corvette. 

Chas


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## Engineercub (Oct 18, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

I sure try Garrett -chuckle- 

-Will 

p.s. - Gifts to each other never hurt and often lead to a romantic evening and potentially some horizontal Tango.


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## cape cod Todd (Jan 3, 2008)

What a funny post. Luckily for me my wife is very understanding. She says that I work very hard for my money and knows that I won't just go blow it, many times I have missed out on something I like on ebay by a few dollars and she says why didn't you bid higher? She knows I have my self imposed limits but as the track wraps around the backyard and reaches to near 400' she is starting to wonder just how much I have invested in this hobby. It helps that I have bought about 98% of my stough used and she knows it.
A funny story: I was in a hobby shop and the owner and I were talking about the cost of the G scale stuff going up and up and the trouble of "getting it by the wife" and he said that he has customers that buy lots of items and they have him mark the box of say that new engine at a fraction of the real cost which seems like a good idea until said customer passes away and the widow brings the trains back in their original boxes and he is more than happy to give her close to what he "paid" .... I don't know if the owner has actually done this but I can see it working in theory. Right or wrong we had a good laugh. 
All I can say is I am lucky to have a wife that understands. In fact I set about rebuilding my RR this spring to get rid of the steep grades and had to add alot of track footage to do this and I'm still in the midst of a ton of work and she said "Why don't you avoid all the work and just buy a shay" She is the best.


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## blueregal (Jan 3, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Best advice, which I have not adhered to is GET A DOG!! They don't care what you spend, and don't ask for alimony when they decide they have had enough of you trying to hide everything from them!!! Hah LOL 

P.S. and of course before you all take me to task on this advice I do love my wife!!!! 

Once when we were first married, my wife asked me who i loved more, her or the dogs I had at the time? Of course I did what any red blooded American male would do, I said in jest, we'll of course the dog's cause they don't cause me any problems!! Oh boy I came home that night to an empty house, but luckily she came back after her mother told her she should, not sure if that was good advice or not but she's been here since then and it will be 38 years this July!! Lucky me huh?????? The Regal


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## GG (Jan 1, 2009)

Posted By blueregal on 06/01/2009 6:18 PM
Best advice, which I have not adhered to is GET A DOG!! They don't care what you spend, and don't ask for alimony when they decide they have had enough of you trying to hide everything from them!!! Hah LOL 

P.S. and of course before you all take me to task on this advice I do love my wife!!!! 

Once when we were first married, my wife asked me who i loved more, her or the dogs I had at the time? Of course I did what any red blooded American male would do, I said in jest, we'll of course the dog's cause they don't cause me any problems!! Oh boy I came home that night to an empty house, but luckily she came back after her mother told her she should, not sure if that was good advice or not but she's been here since then and it will be 38 years this July!! Lucky me huh?????? The Regal





Did someone say "DOG?" 

That is my secret... I can mix everyone up after 26 years and get it right... 









gg


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## Mik (Jan 2, 2008)

*RE: Getting things past the "Wife"*

Is an old bachelor with dogs better or worse than a crazy cat lady? 

I think I'd rather keep Kim, at least she doesn't make me sneeze.... and if I ask nice she'll make me breakfast, too.


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